letting go. again.

time and time again i realize what we have and how much it’s worth fighting for. all the memories we shared, the adventures we set out on, and the happiness we found in one another. but after all that, all the difficulties and triumphs we faced, in the end I’m not the one for you. I was blindly hoping that we both could get what we wanted out of this, but that isn’t the case. Rather we are just hurting each other more and more. Picking at scabs that hurt and bleed, but we do it because when it heals it will fade away. I loved you the first time I met you and I will continue to love until the end of time. I’M SORRY I CAN’T LOVE YOU THE WAY YOU WANT ME TO. I just have to come to terms that I have to let go and move on. For me at least, that’s going to be the most difficult task ever. No one ever is going to understand what we had and I don’t expect anyone to either. I just want you to be happy, but I need to be happy too. These past 9 years have been the best. Spending almost every day and hour with you. I’ll be honest, I’m scared. I really don’t know what to do from here. In truth, I’ll be truly alone. No one to rely on but myself. I miss you already and I will miss you until we are face to face again. I love you “Lauren”.